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精彩对白：
- Amanda: And then I figured, what the hell. I finished off the cold spaghetti in the refrigerator, and ate that last lobster tail and then I heated up some chicken pot pie.
- Amanda: Don't be mad at me, but I ate.
- Amanda: I couldn't help it. I was starving when I got back from the audition, so I had a little sliver of that Sara Lee cream cheesecake. Then I had another one. You know what I'm like when I get started. Before I knew it, I'd finished the whole cake.
- Amanda: I've had a crush on you since we met. Couldn't you tell, the way I was ignoring you?
- Amanda: No, I did it because I had to find out if there was something wrong with me. Because I can't sleep with you, the person that I love. I had to know if I was some kind of freak, or frigid. I had to know if I could even get aroused anymore and have an orgasm.
- Amanda: Okay. Okay, I slept with Ron Keller. But I didn't do it because I care about him.
- Amanda: What a question. Just because I pull away when you touch me?
- Amanda: Yeah. It's good news. I can.
- David Dobel: I broke up with this girl, and they put me with a psychiatrist who said, "Why did you get so depressed, and do all those things you did?" I said, "I wanted this girl and she left me." And he said, "Well, we have to look into that." And I said, "There's nothing to look into. I wanted her and she left me." And he said, "Well, why are you feeling so intense?" And I said, "Cause I want the girl." And he said, "What's underneath it?" And I said, "Nothing." He said, "I'll have to give you medication." I said, "I don't want medication. I want the girl." And he said, "We have to work this through." So, at that point, I took a fire extinguisher from the casement and struck him across the back of his neck.
- David Dobel: In eros veritas
- David Dobel: Let me tell you, I am of the Hebrew persuasion, but that guy who handles you is a member of one of the lost tribes of Israel that should have remained lost.
- David Dobel: The pill makes her crazy? Falk, she *is* crazy. The Pentagon should use her hormones for chemical warfare.
- David Dobel: The thing I'm going to miss the most is the kids. The kids here are wonderful kids... they're bright... you should see the creative ways they smuggle weapons past the metal detectors.
- Dobel: Have you ever dialled 9-1-1? It's like trying to get a mortgage!
- Dobel: I took the liberty a couple weeks ago of ordering you a little present.
- Dobel: Well suppose you're home one night, you know, in bed masturbating and some guys try to break in. You need protection!
- Dobel: Well, they're having a sale here on surplus Russian Army riffles.
- Jerry Falk: And can you?
- Jerry Falk: Do you love me?
- Jerry Falk: Jesus, is there any furniture left in the house?
- Jerry Falk: No! I just dial 9-1-1.
- Jerry Falk: No? What then? To punish him?
- Jerry Falk: Remind me to add him to my Christmas list if I ever learn how to make a letter bomb.
- Jerry Falk: Well, there was something compelling about your apathy.
- Jerry Falk: What?
- Jerry Falk: Yeah. So what can it possibly mean? Look, I can't keep wasting my hour here describing lunatic dreams. I have a date with Amanda. I can't keep running around town on the sly and live like this. Amanda can handle it, but I need help. What do I do? I have to extricate myself from Brooke. It'll break her heart. She wants to marry me.
- Jerry Falk: You ate the whole Sara Lee cream cheesecake?
- Jerry Falk: You ate?
- Psychiatrist: Tell me about your dream. The Cleveland Indians all got jobs at Toys R Us?
- Psychiatrist: What comes to mind about the Cleveland Indians?