精彩对白:
- Adriana Cruz:
A ten-page atlas of Saddam's bunkers?
- Adriana Cruz:
Are you ready to work with me now?
- Adriana Cruz:
Good, 'cause I've got an amazing lead.
- Adriana Cruz:
I don't want him walking away from me, going to other reporters, and giving away my stories.
- Adriana Cruz:
What's the real story?
- Adriana Cruz:
Yeah look at me, I've got my clothes on - I'm dressed!
- Adriana Cruz:
You don't fuckin' tell people that.
- Amir Abdullah:
They have half a million men in the desert and they send four guys to pick up all this bullion? I don't think so.
- Amir Abdullah:
You know what I think? You're stealing gold, that's what I think. We're fighting Saddam and dying, and you're stealing gold.
- Archie Gates:
A little Disneyland, isn't it?
- Archie Gates:
Any questions?
- Archie Gates:
As in people do what is most necessary to them at any given moment.
- Archie Gates:
Bullshit. I'm talking about millions in Kuwaiti bullion.
- Archie Gates:
Bush told the people to rise up against Saddam. They thought they'd have our support. They don't. Now they're getting slaughtered.
- Archie Gates:
Captain of proctologists?
- Archie Gates:
Close.
- Archie Gates:
Good afternoon. Would this be the proctology tent?
- Archie Gates:
I know. That's the way it works.
- Archie Gates:
It just changed!
- Archie Gates:
It was in the guy's ass.
- Archie Gates:
Load the people into the Humvee!
- Archie Gates:
Make room!
- Archie Gates:
Maybe it's the urology tent. Or the neurology tent. Or the nose and throat tent.
- Archie Gates:
Necessity.
- Archie Gates:
No unnecessary shots, Conrad, 'cause we know what they do.
- Archie Gates:
No, not the little cubes you put in hot water to make soup.
- Archie Gates:
Sit down. What do you see here?
- Archie Gates:
Specifically, the worst thing about a gunshot wound, provided you survive the bullet, is something called sepsis.
- Archie Gates:
That's right, Conrad, that's what they do.
- Archie Gates:
That's what makes S.F. so badass, we got the best flashlights.
- Archie Gates:
The way it works is, you do the thing you're scared shitless of, and you get the courage AFTER you do it, not before you do it.
- Archie Gates:
Too dependent on other people.
- Archie Gates:
What stories? You don't have any stories.
- Archie Gates:
What was that?
- Archie Gates:
What's in them?
- Archie Gates:
What's the most important thing in life?
- Archie Gates:
Why would you do that?
- Archie Gates:
Yeah, I'm ready to work with you.
- Archie Gates:
You know anything about gunshot wounds?
- Archie Gates:
You know you're on the path to truth when you smell shit, isn't that what they say?
- Archie Gates:
You're scared, right?
- Archie Gates:
You're wrong.
- Archie Gates:
[about Kuwaiti gold] My guess is he's divided these bricks into several different stashes. Just one of these stashes will be easy to take from Saddam's deserting army, and that will be enough to get us out of our day jobs. Unless, of course, you reservists are in love with your day jobs.
- Archie Gates:
[to Col. Horn, about the Gulf War] Just tell me what we did here!
- Archie Gates:
[to Troy Barlow] Are you able to control him?
- Camp soldier:
It was in the guy's dick, they had to pull it out with a pair of tweezers.
- Camp soldier:
That's not the real story.
- Camp soldier:
Yeah, only real small, like those books you get in a box of Cracker Jacks.
- Cathy:
Oh look at you Adriana, look at what's become of you.
- Chief Elgin:
Alright, but it won't be a convertible.
- Chief Elgin:
Bunkers, sir.
- Chief Elgin:
Either way, the Good Lord has put this map in our path and I believe we're gonna find something.
- Chief Elgin:
Exactly!
- Chief Elgin:
God's will.
- Chief Elgin:
Hold on, we can help these people first, and then we can be on our way.
- Chief Elgin:
I don't care if he's from Johannesburg. I don't want to hear Dune Coon or Sand Nigger from him or anybody else.
- Chief Elgin:
I told you, Lexus don't make a convertible.
- Chief Elgin:
Infection of the blood...
- Chief Elgin:
Infiniti has a convertible but not Lexus.
- Chief Elgin:
No, sir.
- Chief Elgin:
Why do you let this cracker hang around with you, man?
- Col. Horn:
You are all under arrest, you're getting court-martialed and you're gonna show us that bullion.
- Conrad Vig:
Blacks make better receivers than quarterbacks.
- Conrad Vig:
Captain uses those terms.
- Conrad Vig:
Didn't think I'd get to see anybody get shot in this war.
- Conrad Vig:
Don't tell people that.
- Conrad Vig:
I don't know.
- Conrad Vig:
I don't really have a day job, sir.
- Conrad Vig:
I rigged the football with C-4, sir.
- Conrad Vig:
Kaboom! Y'all see that cow's head shoot up? It's like a cartoon! It's fuckin' crazy!
- Conrad Vig:
Lord knows what kind of vermin live in the butt of a Dune Coon.
- Conrad Vig:
Make infected pockets full of bile, sir.
- Conrad Vig:
Man... I didn't join the army to pull paper our of people's asses
- Conrad Vig:
Maybe.
- Conrad Vig:
One gold Rolex would get me a very nice split-level house outside of Garland.
- Conrad Vig:
That's a dumbass way to work. It should be the other way around.
- Conrad Vig:
We three kings be stealin' the gold...
- Conrad Vig:
What's a proctologist, sir?
- Conrad Vig:
What, love?
- Conrad Vig:
Yeah, is it true to be special forces, you gotta cut off an enemy's ear?
- Conrad Vig:
Yeah, me too.
- Conrad Vig:
You mean them little cubes you put in hot water to make soup?
- Conrad Vig:
[pointing a machine gun at Iraqi soldiers] Don't make me smoke your ass, Abdul!
- Sgt. Troy Barlow:
Conrad, you've washed your hands like ten times.
- Sgt. Troy Barlow:
Great! A fuckin' tank! That should send us on our way.
- Sgt. Troy Barlow:
He's all right, man. He's from a group home in Dallas. He's got no high school.
- Sgt. Troy Barlow:
That's not the point, Conrad. The point is that Towel Head and Camel Jockey are perfectly good substitutes.
- Soldier:
Are we shooting?
- Soldier:
What's the answer?
- Soldier:
What?
- Troy Barlow:
Are we shooting?
- Troy Barlow:
As in?
- Troy Barlow:
Captain's at a staff meeting, sir.
- Troy Barlow:
Five Rolexes would get my family that Lexus convertible.
- Troy Barlow:
Hey, I don't know if I can do this. I got a family. If I'm gonna shit in a bag for the rest of my life because I got shot after the war was over, that would pretty fucking stupid wouldn't it, Major?
- Troy Barlow:
Hey, would you take those fucking things off?
- Troy Barlow:
I don't know the answer! That's what I'm trying to find out!
- Troy Barlow:
I'll bet you a Lexus they do.
- Troy Barlow:
I'm gonna buy a set of Lexus convertibles in every color.
- Troy Barlow:
Let's just stick to the plan. The plan is for the gold, right?
- Troy Barlow:
Respect.
- Troy Barlow:
Stop speaking right now, Conrad!
- Troy Barlow:
Stuff they stole from Kuwait.
- Troy Barlow:
That's what I'm asking you!
- Troy Barlow:
There's no room!
- Troy Barlow:
They do not work during the day!
- Troy Barlow:
Walter, just stand outside so Chief can translate my Iraqi ass map... okay?
- Troy Barlow:
We'll I'm gonna be wearing some fashionable Kevlar.
- Troy Barlow:
What is it then?
- Troy Barlow:
Whatever happened to necessity?
- Troy Barlow:
Wrong.
- Troy Barlow:
Yeah, he could also put a land mine in our path if we go out there.
- Troy Barlow:
Yes they do, it has room in the back for a kid's seat.
- Troy Barlow:
Yes, sir. He'll be fine, I promise.
- Walter:
I never got to use night-vision.
- Walter:
Yeah, they kinda work.
- [after seeing that Chief can't throw a football straight]
- [Conrad retrieved a map from an Iraqi's soldier's butt]
- [cut to a shot of Troy getting ink all over himself at his office; cut to a shot of Chief throwing luggage onto a plane; cut to a shot of Conrad shooting stuffed animals with a shotgun]
- [Maj. Gates knows a map has been found in one of an Iraqi soldier's orifices, but isn't sure which]
- [Maj. Gates stops the car after hearing an explosion]
- [Walter's wearing night-vision goggles in broad daylight]
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